God's Lab Rat

I'm not saying God is experimenting on me. I actually mean this in the best possible way. I'm talking about God's will, and how He has a way of closing off or opening up certain areas to channel us in the right direction. In my life, He is doing this through added responsibility, and added challenges.

Responsibility from God is an honor. If He gives you a job to do, or two or three or four, feel blessed. I do. By my own request, and through a series of events, I've taken on a brand new leadership role within my church, I've got to step more fully into one I've apparently had, and I've got to expand my reach in a third. Each of these areas is challenging in its own way and I am being pushed as an individual to learn new things and strengthen myself in certain areas. Most importantly, these challenges have become integrated into my personal prayer and study life, and I AM GROWING!

I pray all the time for a better prayer life, and naturally, for a closer walk with God. I pray these things out of habit. And, although I sincerely desire those things (obviously) I never think too much about how God's going to bring them about in a tangible, visible or measurable sort of way. I've realized over the past week or so that He's been working on these things in my life for some time, and now, I must be getting to the place where my eyes are open, my vision is clearer, and I can really see how He's doing it. AWESOME!

I believe one thing that has brought this epiphany on, is the fact that I've stopped viewing my walk as "just for me." With the added responsibility, I've come to realize that the quality of my walk is going to directly impact the walks of others. If I'm not where God wants me, doing what He wants me to do, studying what He wants me to study, acting and behaving how He wants me to act and behave, how am I going to lead, teach and bless others? Everything is connected.

Example: If I don't pray and seek God before leading praise and worship, how will I know which songs to pick and what words to speak? I must be in tune (no pun intended) before my fingers hit the keys in order to be sensitive to the spirit and God's intentions for that service. THAT is an awesome responsibility, but an amazing blessing, too. To have such direction and immediacy in prayer! "God help me and lead me and show me RIGHT now, so I can do exactly what you need me to do RIGHT NOW." And, the results are immediate - I pray for God to use me, I tell Him in prayer that the talents and gifts He has given me belong to Him. Then I witness and feel Him use them for His glory. He tells me what to do, I do it, and then He goes to work. It's like an out-of-body experience. I watch and see what He is doing and I feel such closeness to Him, I feel such worth. I don't want this to sound like it's about me, because it's not. It's about Him. Just like an offering or any other sacrifice we offer up, God takes it and uses it in the way He chooses.

Thank you, God, for allowing me to work for you.